Talking about bacon onesies yesterday got me thinking: is bacon clothing something that’s more popular than even I imagined? Bacon, it turns out, is definitely a wise choice for the fashion conscious. Or, as they say, bacon never goes out of style. Here are five bacon-y clothing options for the daring. Also, number Two I think has a shot with Victoria Secret. Number five has a shot in Milan for sure.
1. Cafe Press bacon t-shirts
If you are just starting to get into bacon clothing, Cafe Press is your go-to site. They feature a wide variety of bacon t-shirts with slogans ranging from the simple and heartfelt (“I heart bacon”) to the witty (“Push Button, Receive Bacon”) to the confusing (“Of course you smell bacon”). Choose wisely, my friend!
The great thing about Cafe Press is that you can make your own bacon clothing if you have a particularly awesome idea. And you can slap that slogan on pretty much anything, including aprons, tank tops, sweatshirts and underwear. The possibilities for creating your own personal work of genius are limitless. For instance, I don’t see a “Bacon is my co-pilot” thong in there, and I this is something that needs to be made now.
2. Ginch Gonch bacon underwear
If you are looking for something a little more sexy, Ginch Gonch is selling bacon-themed underwear. I didn’t publish the image on this article because it has to much bacon awesomeness (or technically borderline NSFW) The Holidays are coming up ladies, be sure to check out their boxer briefs for the discerning, intelligent and tasteful man in your life. For instance, the elasticized waistband on the undies is a strip of bacon, which is a nice touch. As well, I think these Ginch Gonch tighty-whities say you are fully committed to the bacon lifestyle. And what’s more sexy than that? Never mind don’t answer that!
3. Bacon Keds
To go with the bacon skateboard I featured yesterday, here are some bacon Keds. They look like pretty much as you’d imagine they’d look: like Keds covered in bacon. It’s probably a good idea to consider them – as they say, it’s always the shoes that make the outfit, and the bacon that makes the man. (“They” don’t probably say this, but I do.)
4. Bacon Tuxedo
I was initially excited when I found out about this: surely this is the greatest piece of menswear ever created? Unfortunately, although this website claims to sell it (for $99 bucks, no less!), I can’t find any evidence that it actually exists. In fact, on a related site, it appears to be simply just a box that you put other presents into. I really can’t think of another way to make the bacon-lover mad in your life, but maybe some people enjoy being taunted with the perfect gift before they are eventually given a tie. I don’t know – it just doesn’t sound fun to me. Oh, and if you do decide to buy the bacon tux, let us know if it is real!
5. Bacon Au Natural
I’d provide some links, but we do try to keep this site family friendly. Basically, some folks don’t just like to wear bacon-like pieces of clothing. Sometimes, folks like to actually wear bacon. I can’t imagine how this would be very comfortable. I mean, what food products actually are comfortable to wear?
But I guess some people really like the idea of getting as close as possible to their bacon. This, of course, is something I can always get behind. I would just suggest eating it, rather than draping it across your body.